Tanukichi Love
by Miz-KTakase
Summary: Story #42 in our Tales of the Bizarre, as it revolves around Shimoneta. Tanukichi reunites with Anna, after lots of therapy AND her mother's laws abolished. But there is ONE wedge between them... Ayame Kajou. Rated M for sexual themes, foul language, violence, blood, and drug/alcohol use. (And since Ayame Kajou is in this, be warned of the unfiltered words she says).


From a faraway town in Tokyo, Japan, two people were making out in a small bedroom. One was male with brown hair, and another was female with long black hair. They were under the satin red covers, and they were both naked. He hugged her and kissed her on the lips and said, "I love you, Ayame Kajou…"

Ayame said, "And I love you, too, Tanukichi Okuma… almost as much as I love dirty jokes…"

Tanukichi said, as he whispered, "How about we have an even dirtier night?"

She giggled, as Tanukichi went under the covers, while Ayame was moaning in arousal. She started to shake and moan, while heaving in pants.

"Oh… Tanukichi… Fuck me… AH! AAAH! Yes… Do me… Touch my pussy… Yes… Fuck me with that dick… Insert me… inside… augh… Fuck me! Fuck me! Yes! Yes! Yes! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

* * *

"FUCK YOU!"

 **SMASH!  
** She threw a china plate at Tanukichi, in the kitchen, as she was furious.

 ** _Three weeks ago…_**

Tanukichi was wearing a yellow shirt and jeans, while Ayame was in a revealing green blouse and tight pale blue pants. Why was Ayame angry at Tanukichi?

This happened, three weeks ago, as Tanukichi was hanging out with Ayame, months after he broke up with Anna Nishikinomiya. And to later learn, just now, that Anna is visiting Tanukichi, for a reunion, without Ayame knowing. This made Tanukichi dumbfounded and Ayame pissed off.

* * *

 _Did you ever had a problem? Mister Tanukichi Okuma, from another world where sex and romance is scarce, and the law of decency has recently been abolished, is in a crossroads of his life. His former crush and flame is coming over to visit him, and Anna's BFF, Miss Ayame Kajou, is appalled by the surprised arrival. Is this really a match made in heaven, or a match made in hell?  
Tanukichi Okuma, on a one-way trip… to a " **Tale of the Bizarre** "… with NO turning back…_

* * *

 ** _Tales of the Bizarre #42  
Tanukichi Love_**

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer:_** _The following fic is NOT intended for children. This is a "Shimoneta" fanfic, which is heavily uncensored (from Ayame Kajou only), and contains sexual scenes and explicit language.  
Reader's Discretion is Advised!_

* * *

"What the fuck! Are you nuts?" Ayame protested, "Are you saying that the Princess of Vaginal Waste Disposal is visiting you, just to make up?"

"Look, I don't know what's gotten into her, but she's said that she's changed." He replied.

"She's off her rocker, and not much of her cocker, too!"

"Oh, stop it! And I thought you and Anna were best friends!"

"We are! But that was before I learned that she's misunderstanding the logics of romance, love, and sex! Anna may be innocent, wholesome, and pure, but she's a ditz and an airhead! And also, batshit crazy."

"Oh, like you'd be against Anna's ways of _Love Nectar_?"

Ayame shuddered, as she said, "Look, I don't approve of it, either, but I can't let her stay, leaking her cum, all over my carpets! I just had them shampooed, last week! If she were to stay, she wears adult diapers!"

"Oh, you're being a bossy mother, rather than a horny teenager!" He yelled.

She smirked, "But I do like to rub up my tits to the window… They're so huge…"

She moaned, "But not as huge as Anna's…"

He cried, "SEE? You become adverse to assertive, in three seconds!"

"I _am_ very humorous… and so open-minded… when I spread my legs out…"

"SHUT UP!"

Ayame walked off and said, "Look, I'm sorry, but I'm not going to stick around longer, whilst you two lovebirds rekindle your cum-infested fuckfest!"

She hissed, "You make me sick."

She marched off with a scoff, as he thought, in complete worry, "Ayame… She's mad at me. I wonder what I did to hurt her feelings."

 **XXXXX**

Tanukichi was in the basement, as he was getting the sleeping bag out. He said that it'll be for Anna, since Tanukichi and Ayame share the bed. Ayame appeared from downstairs, as she said, "You're getting the bags for the bitch?"

He nodded, as he said, "Yes…"

"Get _two_."

"TWO?!"

"Fuck you, if you think you're sleeping with _me_ , again. You get the bed, Anna and I will sleep out in the front."

He groaned, "Look, why do we fight? For one moment, we were an odd couple, talking different beliefs. Next thing you know, you suddenly had something I like, as we were bond in bondage…"

"Good one~!" Ayame chuckled.

Tanukichi continued, "But now… It's like you won't talk to me, anymore."

She said, "That was different. I mean, you were the son of a famous ero-terroist, whilst I was THE ero-terrorist, Blue Snow! It's not that I am grateful, it's just that you've met the wrong girl. She's misunderstood on romance, especially since her womanhood is simply venom…"

"I know. But DO NOT remind me of… _th-those…_ "

"Ohhhhh… You mean the cookies?"

 _It was years ago, as Anna gave Tanukichi and Ayame a pack of cookies, in colored bags. All three were dressed in dark grey blazers and black skirts, with silver bracelets and chokers on. Ayame had her long black hair done in a tuxedo braid, and was wearing glasses. Anna, a woman with white hair, was smiling to her classmates._

 ** _Miz-K Note:_** _The following scene MAY BE shocking and disturbing.  
For those with weak constipations and heart conditions, be careful. Thank you._

 _"Here. I brought cookies to school." She said to her classmates, "I baked them myself, especially for you two."_

 _She gave the cookies out, as she said, "These are for Miss Ayame… and for you, Mr. Okuma."_

 _She gasped, as she said, "OH! I should make us some tea."_

 _She went to the hotplate to make tea, as Okuma asked Ayame, "She's acting like her normal self. So, it must've been a dream!"_

 _Anna asked, "Something wrong?"_

 _They gulped, as Anna brought tea, "Please don't be shy. Go on! Eat my cookies!"_

 _Ayame took a bite and said, "Uh, sure. Your cookies are always so moist and delicious."_

 _Tanukichi took a bite, too, but thought to himself, "What's that flavor? It tastes good, but… kinda strange."_

 _Anna suddenly held her tea tray from her bosom, as she nudged her hip into the table corner, rubbing and nudging it, steadily and creaky. She spoke in a very heavy aroused voice._

 _"How do you like it, Mr. Okuma?" She asked, as her eyes widened, her face was blushing, and her body was shaken, "I added something extra. The secret ingredient is LOVE…"_

 _Ayame asked, in fright, "Uh, Anna… What are you-?"_

 _Anna continued to rub her hip onto the corner, as she was leaking clear fluid from her skirt. She explained, as Okuma was shaken in fear and disgust, "You see, I discovered something, last night… When my feelings for Mr. Okuma reached their peak, the emotions deep down in my body turned to liquid, and exploded like a gushing volcano. I named my Miraculous Discharge "Love Nectar". And I'm so honored that you, Mr. Okuma, are the first to devour it."_

 _He gasped in horror, as Anna squealed in romantic suppression and extreme arousal, "Your cookies… … …HAVE MY LOVE NECTAR MIXED IN THE DOUGH!"_

 _Okuma dropped his cookie and shrieked in horror, "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?"_

"Ew… And I didn't mind it, since it was from another woman's vagina… at first, of course, but fainted from food poisoning." Ayame said, "Sweat it out. We all knew why she was freaky. It's just that she doesn't know the difference between love and lust."

"Yeah, don't remind me… A stalker was after me, and she even gave me that disgusting stuff in an envelope. SICKENING!" He sobbed, "I hate her… so much…"

Ayame said, "I know. But after Anna's Mom's laws were abolished, you started dating, only to realize that it was all for naught. And she became this psychopathic love hunter, and always after you, for some reason."

"That was ages ago, and I'm glad I can be away from her, for good. But now she's forgiving me, and I can't bear to admit that the girl I ever loved was a crazed-out nectar-spewing psychopath!"

Ayame sat down and said, "I know… I did help you get closer to her… but it wasn't until after you broke up, you came to me, and I did the old " _I told you so_ " routine at you. Seriously, Tanukichi. You and Anna dated for 2 months, and after she spewed her nectar on you, again and again, she went into therapy. _He, he, the rapy…_ What's done is done, and you get to hang out with me, from now on, until I say so… which is soon, because I'm appalled by you."

"And why not?"

"Because you should've told me, sooner, nut sack! Thanks to you, I'm stuck babysitting your ex with such brain matter that can fill an entire tentacle into the butthole! In other words, her cranium is hollow, you can fuck it with a 300-mile penis!"

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT!"

She huffed, "Look, since Anna's going to make amends, I'm staying out of this one. You had your chance with Anna, and suddenly, it exploded into millions of pieces, and your heart was shattered to liquid… Oopsies, _cum references,_ again."

"GET OUT!" He yelled, "GET AWAY FROM ME! Must you humiliate me, even further?!"

She grumbled, "The only reason I recruited you, a while back, was because I wanted to help and Anna get together! The least you can do is thank me! But now, look at you, you loser! The one girl you ever had the hots for, is yours, for always… but it exploded like her vagina, when she's masturbating!"

She walked upstairs, as she sarcastically waved to him, "You're welcome."

She marched back up, as he pulled out two sleeping bags. He grumbled, as he said, "Stupid girl. It's her fault I dated Anna, and it ended with disaster. I wish she was dead."

 **DING-DONG!  
** Ayame called, as she ran to the door, "AAAAH! I'm _cumming~!_ HAHAHA~!"

She opened the door and saw a woman in long white hair, done up to her shoulders, and wearing an ice blue dress and canary yellow pants. She bowed and giggled, "Miss Ayame… It's been so long~."

She hugged her, as Ayame croaked a bit and moaned, "Uh, Anna? What brings you here?"

Anna explained, "Well, Mother released me from the hospital, after my therapy proves successful. And then grounded me, for releasing my… _Love Nectar_ to Mr. Okuma and you. And then lectured me about… ewugh… vaginal excrement…"

"That sucks cock."

"Miss Ayame!"

"Sorry. But her laws were abolished. You're free to speak dirty, now."

"How long has it been?"

"I'm okay with her laws, but they _were_ very weird."

"I know. I hope Miss Tsukimigusa and Mr. Gouriki will forgive me…"

"They will." She held her shoulder, as she hugged her.

Anna asked, "Hey, where's Mr. Okuma? I want to see him, since you were with her."

"That asshole? Yeah, he's here. That loser only wants your pussy, and fuck up your tits, after he felt sorry for you. But he's such a pervert."

Ayame was speaking the truth, since she and Tanukichi had a fight, and Anna was worried, "Did you and Mr. Okuma had a fight?"

Ayame boasted, "Pretty much. And before you ask, we're _not_ in a relationship! EVER! He's my partner, that's all."

She sat down on the couch, as Anna said, "Well, can I make myself at home? I promise I won't be a nuisance… since Mr. Okuma and I are going to hang out… like old times…"

She kneeled to her and wept, "And about the cookies, long ago, I'm sorry! I didn't know! I can't help it! PLEASE! Tell Mr. Okuma that I want another chance!"

Ayame huffed, as she ignored her, "How will I know you _won't_ go into your psycho girlfriend mode, again?"

"Therapy helped me~! I am no longer psychopathic, and I'm watching where I touch, from now on."

"Exactly how long were you grounded for?"

"As long as therapy lasted… Mother never spoke to me, since then…"

Anna was crying, as Ayame felt sorry for her. She kneeled to her and said, "It's okay. Don't cry. I'm sorry."

They shared a hug, as Anna wept, "Miss Ayame…"

She bawled, as Ayame started to sniffle. She held her own and said, "It's alright. Let it out, and lash out your breasts, cock-suck."

Anna giggled, "Oh, you're so funny."

Tanukichi arrived, as he asked, "Anna? Why are you here?"

Ayame said, "Hey, loser. Your ex is here."

Anna ran to him, as he gasped, "Wait… Anna!"

She clasped onto him and laughed, "OH, MR. OKUMA~! OH, OKUMA~! I MISS YOU! LET'S NEVER FIGHT AGAIN!"

Ayame said, as she went to the bedroom, "Well, I'll have you two prepared, whilst I head to the basement. Tanukichi, you can sleep on your own bed. Anna, you sleep with me, in the front room."

Anna asked, "Huh? Not with Mr. Okuma?"

He was suffocating in Anna's huge hug. He gasped for air, turning blue, as he gagged, "Hellllp… Ayame… Can't breathe…"

Ayame huffed, "Reap what you've sewn… Dry-mouthed pervert."

Anna asked him, as he regained air, "I was wondering… Have you and Miss Ayame always fought?"

"Just now. We were friends, but suddenly, she just gave me the cold shoulder."

"I know… I wonder if it was my fault…"

"Yeah, maybe… Anna, you, uh, you want to sleep with me, just so you wouldn't have a lack of romance?"

Anna was shocked, but smiled, "Oh, thank you… I will."

Ayame said, as she prepared the sleeping bags, "Okay, Anna… I got _your_ sleeping bag."

Anna responded, "Oh, that's okay~! Mr. Okuma said that I can sleep with him, for the night!"

Ayame was stunned and shocked, as she was grinning, forcefully. She growled, gritting her teeth, "Oh… Yes… I am glad, Anna, that you changed your mind… Would you excuse me?"

She was holding her anger, as she marched upstairs, while holding her rage in. Anna asked, "Was it something I said?"

He smiled and replied, "Oh, you know Ayame. She's such a polite girl."

Ayame's screams were made, upstairs:  
" ** _FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!_** "

 **SMASH!  
** The mirror on her vanity table suddenly shattered, as Ayame panted heavily. She grabbed a briefcase and packed her things. Tanukichi ran upstairs and cried, "AYAME! WHAT HAPPENED?"

"NOTHING HAPPENED, DICK WAD!" Ayame yelled, "GODDAMN IT!"

He cried, "Well, don't scare me like that!"

She packed frantically, as he barked, "And what are you doing?"

"Packing!" She snuffed, "I'm leaving you, Tanukichi Okuma! I hate you!"

"Why do you hate me now?"

"Because you're a deflated ball sack, whose mind cannot get off his ass about his ex's cum-tastic voyage! And I hate you for that, almost as much as I hate morality! And I also hate tits in fudge, when doing cake farting!"

"EW, GROSS!"

"Sorry. But I'm serious! I'm done with you, Tanukichi!"

"Ayame, I wasn't trying to make you angry!"

"Oh, really? Am I that hot, or is she just full of sexy sauce? Go date your cunt!"

He realized and yelled, "I GET IT NOW! You're jealous of me, are you?"

Ayame closed her briefcase and said, "NO! You are a perverted man, with a perverted life, and I love you for that! I hate the way you are showing that dick of yours, into Anna's fountain of goo! It should be banned from Japan AND all of Asia! HELL, TRY THE WORLD!"

"IF THAT'S HOW YOU'RE GOING TO BE, FINE! I HATE YOU, TOO, AYAME KAJOU!" He yelled.

He opened the briefcase, as he barked, "But you're NOT taking MY clothes, you fucking har-!"

He gasped in horror, as he cried out, holding up three dildos, "WHAT IS THIS? THESE ARE SEX TOYS!"

Ayame smirked, "Duh. What do you think I was going to pack, my stuff? This is _my_ house."

"I THOUGHT YOU WERE LEAVING ME!"

"I AM! You two just have the hots for each other, that I need to be alone, for the night. Plus, nothing beats a five-hour masturbation session, than a midnight run." She giggled.

He moaned, as she held him, and replied, "Hey, what we had was special… but I have no grudge on this. And no, you repulse me. Because you and I are not meant to be. We're partners, not lovers. You're my friend, and that's all. I am not jealous of you, Tanukichi."

"Then why did you yell at me?" He asked her.

Ayame giggled, "I thought Anna might be cured, so I did a little play on our relationship. It worked, and she fell for it, right?"

Tanukichi growled, "You little…"

Ayame closed her suitcase and carried them away, "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to prepare for my all-nighter of cocks and fucks. _Cock-Suck~!_ "

She left to the basement, as he sat down in the bed, and thought, "Thank goodness… And here I thought she'd kick me out…"

Ayame reappeared, as she asked, "Oh, Anna said that she wanted to make dinner. I told her NO. So, I'll cook."

"You can cook, right?"

"Well, sure as hell _you_ won't."

"Oh, leave me alone…"

"Not hungry? Maybe you should make tube steak with Love Nectar…" Ayame jeered, and then ran away. Tanukichi threw a pillow to the door, intended for Ayame.

* * *

That night, Tanukichi was getting ready for bed, as he said, "Now, one night with Anna is all I needed. She said, during dinner, that she wanted to spend a night at the hotel, to make up for her past mistakes. I mean, this, coming from a beautiful girl, whom I wanted as wholesome and pure, but not crazy and bloodthirsty."

Anna suddenly appeared, as she was in her white nightgown. She asked, "Excuse me… Mr. Okuma?"

"OH! Anna? Uh…" He cringed, seeing her lingerie in a see-thru nightie. "I thought I would wear something more enjoyable…"

"Where's Ayame?" He asked.

"She's in the basement. She figured that we needed space…"

"I know…"

She held his hand and said, "Mr. Okuma… About what happened, long ago… I am so sorry for treating you like this… and, well, it's not like I was thinking of doing it, but it's just… this passion of love flows out of me… and ever since we… you know, I was in love with you."

He said, "It's okay. I mean, you were meant for me. But I never knew you were crazy for me… _literally_."

"It's alright. After we broke up, I had a thing for girl-on-girl love, and I dated Miss Tsukimigusa. Odd thing, though… Has Miss Tsukimigusa always had a _joystick_ in her nether region? I know I'm not saying p(BEEP), but it's weird having Miss Tsukimigusa with a long _cucumber_ … for a woman."

He thought, as he was annoyed, "That's because you were on a lesbian date with a _dude_ , Anna!"

After all these years, Anna DID NOT realize that Oboro Tsukimigusa was actually a man, disguised as a woman. Anna wept, as she whimpered, "But that was after I went into therapy… and Oboro and I broke up… It was terrible. She said to me that our love is personal and private. But my protection is more important than passion. Two days… and it wasn't one kiss… SHE NEVER KISSED ME!"

He thought, "That's because _he_ was protecting you."

He said, "That's because _she_ was only protecting you. You remember years ago, about the issue with Gathered Fabric."

"Oh, right… And I was too focused on you, and my unexpected Love Nectar, I lost all hope of love… No man can ever love me, other than you, Mr. Okuma… I love you…"

She caressed her arms around him and said, "It's just… I was so wrong about our mistaken love, it's just that I have confused love over lewd. I'm still against lewdness, and Mother made me understand now… But I'm saddened that everything is wrecked, because we're no longer an "IT" Couple…"

She cried on his shoulder, as he held her tight. They wrapped their arms around each other, as he said, while kissing her on the lips, "We can start again. But under no circumstances… NO kissing in ears… NO cum delivery… and above all, NO raping…"

"Oh, I promise. I'm a changed woman."

They shared a passionate hug, and then started to kiss and kick each other. Anna removed Tanukichi's pajamas, as Anna threw him to the bed. Anna said, "Ayame won't mind…"

She crawled to him, and started to removed her clothes, exposing her bare body. Tanukichi said, as he was smiling, "Looking back, I was frightened by your actions. But now, I can handle it. I've always loved you…"

Anna leaned onto him and said, "Don't be scared of me. Let's see if it's still long and hard, as I thought it was, when I first saw it…"

For the record, Tanukichi's d(BEEP) was exposed for the first time, towards Anna AND Ayame, accidentally. They started to have sex in Ayame's bed, as Anna moaned in pleasure, "DO me, Mr. Okuma… Fire up my tanks… Burn me… Make me feel hot and passionate… Oh…"

She and Tanukichi pulled the covers over each other, and continued on.

Thirty minutes later, Anna & Tanukichi were lying together, as he said, "Wow… I never knew you were such a machine…"

Anna giggled, "I tried to tell you. My love is forever… and I loved you… Mr. Okuma… Promise me to never leave me again…"

He giggled, as he said, "I won't. I won't stay long here. But I guess Ayame wouldn't mind."

They were about to kiss, as Anna grinned evilly, with a gleam in her eye, "Ayame?"

"Well, she did give us the sex toys to try out. That was the first time I ever used a-."

"NO!" Anna barked, "I meant, your friendship with Ayame! She's my best friend, and we are close."

He explained, "Look, I know what you're thinking, but Ayame and I… we're not dating. We never were. We're more of a buddy-buddy thing. And you and I are NOT buddies, but MORE than that."

"Ah, I see… and you love me?"

"I do."

Anna grinned, "Then I have a favor… This house is full of lewdness, and Ayame is such a deceiver. I never knew she had so many lewd sex stuff, for so many ways…"

"Well, she has a hidden urge."

"Ah, I see. Then, we should own this, as our own. My love nectar needs more to fuel… and maybe another taste of yours…"

He sighed, "Not tonight… I need to go to bed, for the morning. I mean, it's for one night. And Ayame doesn't want you to stay…"

"She's obviously mad at me, after the cookie incident…" She suggested, "So, I had a thought, about what we'd do about setting it right… have decided…"

She hissed, "I want to _kill Ayame_ …"

He gasped, "WHAAAAAAAAAAT? KILL AYAME?! THAT'S MURDER!"

She said, "She'd be in the way of our romantic relationship, as she and her lewdness shows no boundaries. Mr. Okuma, please, let me have a talk with Ayame, alone…"

"ARE YOU NUTS? YOU CAN'T KILL HER!" He roared, "IF YOU DO, THEN IT'S NO WORSE THAN THERAPY!"

"I'm sorry… I guess you're right… I can't kill my best friend…" She sniffled, but grinned evilly, " _You're_ going to have to do it…"

Anna's Yandere Form returned, as she forced Tanukichi to kill Ayame. But he said to her, "No… I can't… We've talked about this… I'm not a murderer. I know Ayame's lewd and crass, but she's your best friend. She's kept it hidden, for so long. I mean, you had an urge, right?"

"Oh, right… I guess it's not meant for it. But, Mr. Okuma, therapy helped me, only because I was lonely. I'm so sorry. I was trying to control my urges… but-."

He kissed her and said, "I'll think about it. But NO killing… I don't want to be a murderer. Okay?"

She agreed, as she said, "Let's have another go, Mr. Okuma…"

They resumed another round of sex, as Tanukichi was conflicted with a choice: Anna or Ayame.

 **XXXXX**

Speaking of Ayame, she was sitting on the floor, in the basement, sticking a purple dildo into her skirt, as she was masturbating to herself.

"Ungh… Tanukichi… Unh… Do me… UGH! Oh… Harder… You are so… Oh…"

During her usually sessions, she just thought about Tanukichi, and have thoughts of him, in ecstasy. Ayame let out a huge gasp and moan, and collapsed on the floor, faced down. Her eyes were glazed and dizzy, as her mouth was smiling and drooling. She passed out, after about 45 minutes of her usually _lewd_ activities.

 **XXXXX**

Hours later, Anna was on Tanukichi, continuing their sex. Ayame barged in, as she called, "Tanukichi! Don't mind me. I am coming in, getting my white panties."

She stepped in and said, "Sorry, I just needed a… clean pair… of…"

She shrieked, as Anna & Tanukichi gasped. They covered themselves, as Tanukichi said, "Uh, Ayame… I can explain… You didn't say tha-. Uh, did you know that _therapy_ is also called _The Rape-y_?"

Ayame scowled at him, as she said to Anna, "I think you should go home, Anna…"

Anna stepped back, as she pleaded, "Miss Ayame, please…"

Ayame barked, "And as for you… YOU BASTARD!"

She held up a gun and roared, "GET OUT OF MY LIFE, YOU FUCKING PERVERT!"

Tanukichi yelled, "NO! AYAME, LEMME EXPLAIN! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-!"

 **BANG!**

Tanukichi suddenly woke up from Ayame's gunshot fired. The dream he had was a nightmare, as he was scared. Anna woke up, as she asked, "Oh… Mr. Okuma? What's wrong?"

Tanukichi said to her, "You're right… You were right…"

"About what?"

"About Ayame…"

He then moaned, as he was upset. He said, "Anna… If we are to be together, forever… We have to _kill Ayame Kajou_."

Anna somehow manipulated Tanukichi to make him kill Ayame. But how will it go for them? And will Anna succeed, as she wants Tanukichi, all to himself?

* * *

The next week, Anna and Tanukichi were sitting together on the couch, as Ayame saw them. She asked, "So, it's been a week, and you haven't left?"

Anna said, "Well, once Mother gives her consent, I want to have Tanukichi live with me~! So, if you don't mind, I'd like to stay here, for a few weeks, since my mother wouldn't budge…"

She nudged to him and said, "Right, Tanukichi-kun?"

Okuma nodded, as Ayame said, "Oh, okay. I suppose a couple more weeks won't hurt. But if you leak your cum into _my_ carpet… ONE drop from that Love Nectar… YOU'RE OUT OF HERE!"

Anna pleaded, "Oh, I promise. NO leakage from my… uh…"

"It's alright, Anna…" Tanukichi giggled, "She understands."

Ayame smiled and said, as she walked away, "I'm happy for that. He's got a lot of twisted moments in his life… but I'm happy."

Tanukichi asked, "Okay, she's gone. So, what do we do to kill her?"

Anna said, "Well, I have made traps around the house, so she can be caught in one of those. Once she kicks the bucket, we can live here, forever. I mean, an accident is bound to happen. After she dies, we can report of an accident. I wouldn't murder her, if the incident happens, unexpected."

"Good thinking. Where did you rig the booby traps?"

Moments later, Ayame was cleaning the dishes in the kitchen, and then she walked to the dishwasher. She opened the dishwasher, and out appeared a cleaver from in the dishwasher. It flew off the tray and headed to Ayame. It landed between her feet, as it only flew off in inches. She picked it up and said, "Hmm, this butcher knife seems odd. Have to watch where I wash."

Seconds later, after the dishes were cleaned, she opened the pantry door, and suddenly, huge boxes of food fell onto her. They were king sized boxes of cereal, rice, potatoes, and oatmeal. She was crushed from the pile of boxes. She emerged from the pile, as she moaned, "Did Anna buy a shitload of food, again? Sheesh…"

She cried out, "ANNA! Next time, when you want to go grocery shopping, buy lighter! I know you're rich as fuck, but come on!"

Anna growled, as she was furious, "Damn it! I thought the 500lb. sugar would've worked! I knew I should've bought a 10-gallon container of curry powder!"

 **XXXXX**

Ayame was in the bathroom, as she was relaxing in the tub. She hummed to herself, " _Hmm… hmm-hmm… S-O-X… S-O-S… ima koso seisen no toki…_ "

As she relaxed in the water, a shark fin appeared from the bathwater. She heard rustling water, as she whispered, "What was that?"

She saw a shark and gasped, "AAAGH! WHAT THE HELL?"

The shark approached the naked body of Ayame, but suddenly, it just turned upside down. Ayame was confused, as she asked, "Huh? That's queer… Did that shark just died?"

Anna was peeking in the bathhouse, as she was furious, "Why? Why did that shark have to keel over and die?"

Apparently, Anna never knew that sharks last a long time in sea water, NOT bath water. Ayame pulled out the dead shark, as her wet naked body gleamed in the light, with steam covering her breasts and hip.

"HEY, TANUKICHI! ANNA! LOOK WHO GOT DINNER, TONIGHT?" She called out.

Anna growled, "YOU BITCH! Do you know how much money I spent to SAVE THAT SHARK?"

 ** _Miz-K Note:_** _I am SO sorry for this moment of animal cruelty!_

 **XXXXX**

It didn't end there… Anna even set a trap for her, in the rice cooker. Ayame made some rice for sushi, but… when she opened it, the rice was green and smelly, as Anna coated the rice with laxative. Ayame then gagged, "Ew… Did the rice go bad? Ah well… Better make more…"

She opened the pantry, and-.  
 **WHAM! BAM! POW!  
** "OOF!"  
The boxes stumbled over her, again.

Ayame moaned, as she got out of the pile, "Ungh… ANNA NISHIKINOMIYA! WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT BUYING IN BULK?"

She grumbled, "Oh, fuck cock. I'll order out."

Anna slammed her head to the wall and sobbed, "BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! BITCH! WHY! WON'T! SHE! DIE?!"

* * *

Days had passed, and Anna resorted to electrocution, which would fry Ayame, but all it did was let the power go into a blackout. She even had to make cold water, ice, and snow in her bath. But all Ayame did was get chilled to the bone, and had to be in bed for the day. Anna even resorted to making her wait in the train station, and she would accidentally shove Ayame off. She inadvertently did, by Ayame fell into the train, just in time, surviving the attempted attack.

 **XXXXX**

Two weeks passed, as Tanukichi had a turn at the murder game. He then held up a bottle of champagne and said, "Here, this will be perfect. If you want to kill someone, do it right. We'll make a great fib about you, finding a house to live in. And when we celebrate, we'll drink, until we don't stop."

Anna cried, "Oh, that's great and all, but… we don't drink."

"No, this is non-alcoholic wine. Ayame loves this stuff, whenever she celebrates," he said, as he held the bottle to the table, "But she's ONLY going to have the first drink… and the last."

He stuck a syringe into the cork and inserted a corrosive yellow substance inside. He said that it was enough cyanide to tranquilize a huge Indian Elephant, enraged and wild. Anna asked if it'll work, as Tanukichi said, "She's dense to know what's going on. This girl is about sex, lewd, and masturbation. NO MORE! It ends, under _my_ way."

Anna said, "If this fails, can I have another turn?"

He scolded, "NO! You have lost ALL your murder privileges!"

"Murder privileges?" Ayame asked, as she suddenly appeared, in her orange tank.

"OH! Ayame~!" Okuma smiled, "We were talking about you. It was just an act we were playing."

Ayame said, "I see. You know, strange things have been going on, for the past three weeks, and suddenly, you two are always together, while I end up in some sort of bad luck."

Anna smiled, "Well, you're about to have _good luck_ , Miss Ayame~! Guess what? Mr. Okuma and I decided to get me a place to own~!"

Ayame smiled, "That's wonderful!"

Okuma said, "Yes, isn't it great~? In fact, we should celebrate!"

Ayame grabbed the bottle and said, "Oh, yes. We should. I mean, Anna deserves a treat~!"

She opened the bottle and poured the tainted wine into the three wine glasses. They held their glasses up and made a toast, for their undying friendship. Ayame halted, as she was about to sip. She then said, as she stepped back, "You know, after those three weeks, after our time together, and after all the bad things I said about Tanukichi… I just don't feel like celebrating…"

Anna stated, "Don't be silly~! Miss Ayame, my love nectar isn't in this wine."

Ayame threw the wineglass down, smashing it into pieces, and said, in a sad voice, "No, but neither is my heart."

She said to Tanukichi, "Tanukichi… This is goodbye."

She walked away, as she was hurt, inside, knowing that her friends are leaving her. Anna cried, "WAIT! Miss Ayame, hold on! Don't be like that! Ayame?"

Tanukichi felt upset, as he thought, "What have I done?"

 **XXXXX**

At their bedroom, that night, Anna & Tanukichi were talking with each other, as Anna argued with him, "I don't understand! She usually drinks the wine with us, to celebrate! Why is she upset at us?"

He said, "I don't know! She's never this moody! I wonder what I did… that makes her sad… I feel awful."

He even stated, "But, that doesn't mean I'm going to end this, once and for all. Anna, next time you see me, we'll be rid of Ayame Kajou, forever. I have to talk to her."

He left to the basement, as Anna was sitting bedside, feeling unhappy. She sobbed, "I don't get it… Why are we bad at murder? Ayame… She's like… I don't know…"

She then approached Okuma's underwear drawer, as she whispered, "His underwear drawer…"

She grabbed a handful of his underwear and started to sniff heavily onto them. She was in awe, as she said, "Mr. Okuma's underpants… how I long to smell them, again? Ayame will be gone, and I'll have his boxers, forever…"

Meanwhile, down in the basement, Okuma sees Ayame, who was preparing for bed. He asked her, "Ayame!"

She asked him, in a hurtful voice, "What do you want?"

"Look, I want to know… Why did we fight? Why did we drift apart, and become a very hated couple? I know we're not _literally_ dating, but…" he explained, "But… Do you have a thing for Anna, like… some sort of jealousy?"

Ayame said, as she was upset, "Uh, no… I don't. It's just… I'm never this angry, before. My heart feels like it's throbbing, like a penis about to explode. I mean, all that stimulation and urge… it's like, I want to let it out, all over me…"

He hugged her and said, "I'm sorry. Please don't hate me."

He left, as she asked, "Then… Why are you leaving me?"

"It was only until Anna and I are together, again… But… I don't want you to feel unhappy. We'll come visit you."

"That's swell. OH! Will I ever visit you?"

"Sure. You can…"

He thought, as he was hurt, "What a liar I am…"

She then said, as she was concerned, "What's wrong? You are acting weird… almost as weird as usual, nut sack."

He said, "Never mind. Goodnight."

He went back upstairs, as Ayame said, "I understand. He cares for me, after everything we've been through…"

She went to sleep, as she was unhappy. She huffed, as she grumbled, "That guy has no dick."

She went sound asleep, after that.

Back in the bedroom, as he turned to Anna, "Anna, it's over, alright?"

He gasped, as Anna was sniffing his underwear. He yelled, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

Anna gasped, "Uh, Mr. Okuma, I-."

"Were you sniffing my drawers, again?!"

"I, uh… I'm sorry. But your musk turns me on…"

She then shivered, as she wept, "WHAT? You're… It's over? You're breaking up with me?"

Tanukichi explained, "NO! ALL OF THIS! The murder, the deception, the games… EVERYTHING! Anna, this is NOT the way! I love you, but Ayame's your best friend! If we let her die, what does it make us?"

Anna sobbed, as she was hurt, "I… Oh, Mr. Okuma, what was I thinking? I can't let her die! If I did, Mother would hate me… and my best friend… If she dies, I'm left with you and Mr. Gouriki. And I hope she had friends, unlike you… But it's just so… I wanted to let it out…"

She was about to burst open from down below, but tried to hold it in. He then said to her, "No… Anna, forget it. Let's get some sleep, and tomorrow, we can get you a new house… Besides, we can't take the fib, any longer. Ayame will understand. And you and I can still be together, okay?"

"Okay…"

They kissed again, as Anna smiled, "Thank you, Mr. Okuma."

 **XXXXX**

That night, Anna snuck out of bed and headed to the basement. She crept downstairs, flashlight in hand, as she snuck into the room. She saw Ayame in the sleeping bag, and then looked around. She then saw a screwdriver and said, "Good… Maybe I can kill her, by unscrewing the ceiling fan, above her… No, she'd dodge that, easily…"

She saw a mop and said, "I know, I can make spaghetti with a toxic mop~! No… Ayame would toss it away…"

She then saw a small safe and said, "OH? Is that? What is it?"

She carefully unlocked the safe and saw a pair of panties on a mannequin head. They were draped over the face, as she gasped. Anna recognized it as a panty mask, and suddenly realized that the terrorist Blue Snow wears the same mask. But then, she suddenly figured it out, as she compared Ayame with Blue Snow.

"No… Miss Ayame?" she trembled, "How in the world did-?"

She sobbed and squeaked, as Ayame woke up. She turned on the lights and asked, "Huh? Anna? What are you-?"

Anna pointed at the safe and barked, "AYAME KAJOU! WHAT IS THIS?"

Ayame screamed, "ACK!"

She gasped, and thought, "NO! THAT'S MY BLUE SNOW MASK! I thought I retired it, after her mother's laws were abolished!"

She lied, "Uh, you remember Blue Snow? Well, last time if I recall, prior to our graduation together, I managed to capture Blue Snow, but she got away, buck naked and all. But I kept her uniform, as a trophy. Yep~! Ayame Kajou, Vice President of the Tokioka High School Student Council has ended Blue Snow's reign!"

She laughed heartily, as Anna then realized that Blue Snow _was_ Ayame. She was enraged that she turned to her and hissed, "Liar!"

"Eh?"

"You… You were Blue Snow, weren't you?"

Ayame gasped, as she pleaded, "No, I'm not! This was a trophy! I did catch her, and-."

"You… Why didn't I figure it out, before? The eyes… the hair… the laugh… the stance… the body…"

Anna was furious, and suddenly had a murderous intent. She snarled, "It was you… Ayame Kajou, my best friend… All this time… It was you?"

Ayame was stepping back, as Anna remained angry. She pleaded, as she was cornered, "Now, take it easy. Anna, calm down…"

"You? YOU?"

"I'm NOT Blue Snow! Honest!"

Ayame was terrified, as she pleaded to her best friend that she wasn't Blue Snow. In an infuriated state, Anna clasped onto Ayame's neck and strangled her, choking her to death.

"AAAAAAAAAAAGH! Urk… Tanu-, ki… urk…" Ayame choked.

Anna snarled, with her eyes showing a demonic look, "Blue SNOW! BLUE SNOW! YOU BITCH! I HAVE YOU NOW! YOU WERE BLUE SNOW!"

Ayame gagged, "I… ugh… urgh… I'm… NOT… her…"

Ayame's eyesight was fading, as Anna was about to crush her neck. Anna giggled, as she was psychotic, yet again, "At long last, Mr. Okuma's mine… I can kill him, seeing you were his accomplice… But that wouldn't be right. What's done is done… For years, I wanted to capture and kill Blue Snow… Now, I found her… You lied to me, Ayame… YOU LIED TO ME! DIE! DIE! DIE, YOU FUCKING C(BEEP)!"

Anna grasped harder, as Ayame's arms started to grow limp. Her breathing began to fade, as she weakly whispered, "Tanu… ki… chi… Help… me… You were… You were right… Anna… is batshit… cra-."

Her eyes closed, as Anna was ready to snap her neck. But then…

 **WHANG!  
** A shovel suddenly slammed onto Anna's head, with fierce impact. She collapsed onto the floor, as Ayame was coughing, regaining her breath. Ayame sobbed, as she was hurt. Tanukichi held the shovel and said, "You okay?"

Ayame nodded, "Yes. I'm sorry. I should've believed you."

Tanukichi said, "I… Ayame, I have a confession to make… Anna was going to kill you. She wanted you dead, because she wants me in this home, forever…"

Ayame was stunned, as she asked, "No wonder. But why didn't you say anything?"

"I didn't want to hurt Anna's feelings… but…"

Ayame went to Anna's body, as she was bleeding from her head. She felt her pulse, and was shocked. She was saddened, as tears suddenly appeared from her eyes.

"Ayame? You're crying…" He asked her.

Ayame sniffled, "Anna… … …She's dead. You… You killed her…"

Tanukichi said, "I didn't mean to, but she… she enticed me to kill _you_. She started it! Honest!"

Ayame swatted the shovel out of his hand, grabbed his collar, slammed him into the wall, and roared, "HOW COULD YOU? HOW COULD YOU POSSIBLY DO THIS TO A GIRL YOU WANT TO BANG? SHE'S SO HOT YOU WANT TO FUCK HER! HOW COULD YOU KILL HER, LIKE THAT?"

"I SAVED YOUR LIFE, DIDN'T I?" He yelled.

"BUT THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED! YOU HAVE JUST THROWN IT ALL AWAY, BY KILLING YOUR LOVER!" She hollered, as she was crying, "YOU LOVED HER! SHE HAS THE HOTS FOR YOU, DESPITE THAT SHE USED CUM IN HER COOKIES! YOU KILLED HER! WHY? **WHY, GODDAMN IT?** "

He held her hands and said, "You don't get it… Anna, I love her, because she's innocent and pure… But this? THIS is NOT the Anna Nishikinomiya that I love!"

"How can you love her, now? She's dead!"

"You _still_ don't get it? Anna wasn't the one I love, after that incident with the stalker."

"Huh?"

He held her hands up, showing a balled fist ( _The Fig_ ), with his thumb sticking out, between his index and middle finger. He then said, "Ayame Kajou… I loved Anna… but, when we first met, you were a crazy girl, but you were honest. Anna is not the one I want…"

He kissed her on the lips and said, " _You_ were."

Ayame gasped, "Really?"

He wiped her tears and said, "Ayame… I love you. Not Anna… You were the only one who'd understand… yet you cannot shut your four mouths… because I have but only one…"

She wept, as she giggled, "You fucking masturbator… You had me at " _crazy girl_ "… I…"

She confessed, "I love you, Tanukichi Okuma, as much as I loved dirty jokes. NO! EVEN MORE! But I still love dirty jokes, almost as much… as you and your huge cock… and your sexy abs… and that toned ass… You're an erotic plumber's dream, come to life…"

He asked, "You mean it?"

"I didn't need my flip phone, just to confess. It's true… I've loved you, since we first met…"

He said, as he held her head, "I didn't know you'd care… Ayame…"

"Shut up and kiss me, you animal!"

They started to kiss and caress each other. They continued to make out, over Anna's dead body, as they started to have sex in the basement. Ayame & Tanukichi began to start their new life, as boyfriend and girlfriend.

* * *

Back to the present, Tanukichi and Ayame were in bed, as they were exhausted. He said to her, "Ayame… For the first time in my life, I have nothing to object about your lewdness and sexual acts."

Ayame smiled, "I tried to tell you. I love you, as much as I loved dirty jokes."

"I know… Can you ever forgive me for hurting you?"

Ayame grabbed the champagne and said, "Well, I do. We'll worry about Anna's corpse, later… unless, of course, you had to fuck a dead corpse."

"Oh, no. I was too busy fucking you, rather than fucking Anna…"

"Hah! I knew you wouldn't be in necrophilia. Wuss!"

They shared champagne, as he toasted, "Here's to you… My love…"

Ayame giggled, "I'll drink to that~!"

They started to drink the wine. However, Ayame sniffed the glass, before she could drink it. She sniffed the contents and said, "Cyanide? Is that-?"

Her eyes opened widely, as Tanukichi drank the tainted wine that he created to kill Ayame, earlier. She swatted the glass off his hand, and then shrieked, " **NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!** "

But it was too late. He started to cough up blood, and then started to gag and choke. He grabbed Ayame's bare naked body, and whispered, "Aya… me… I… … love… … … you…"

He collapsed on the bed and was lying on the mattress, limp and motionless. She tried to revive her, but she couldn't. Tanukichi Okuma was dead. Ayame couldn't stop crying, as she threw the remaining wineglass from in her hand, and threw it to the wall. She blubbered, as she hugged his dead corpse.

"NO… NO! DAMN YOU! Tanukichi… No… Why? Why would you do that? You're… You're the only one I ever loved… Tanukichi… Please… No… NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOO! Waaaaaaaaaah… Nooooooooo… Tanukichi… Don't leave me…"

She cried on his dead chest, as she was pleading for him to come back, but no amount of dirty jokes and sex toys could ever bring back the boy she knew and met, and formed SOX, and helped her launched an ero-terrorist pact. Ayame would continue crying, until later that afternoon, when she called the police.

 **XXXXX**

That afternoon, the coroners carried the bodies of Anna & Tanukichi away, in black body bags, while the police have taken Ayame away, only for questioning. Ayame was crying, as her hands were on her face, as the police escorted her to the police car.

* * *

 _A tale of tragedy, romance, murder, deception, and death…  
Tanukichi Okuma and Ayame Kajou – the story of star-crossed lovers-slash-perverts, separated by a close friend and former flame, and taken from minor setbacks. Fate brought these two together, at last, but ended, before it started._

 _Tanukichi Okuma… forever a memory, who had found the love of his life, and lost it, in the blink of an eye. This was a tale of sadness, betrayal, and adult-related lust… and all combined into one… " **Tale of the Bizarre** "…_

* * *

 ** _To be continued…_**

* * *

 ** _Miz-K NOTE:_** _If you think that this "Shimoneta/Shimoseka" Bizarre fic is the end, think again! Next time around, a sequel to this fic will be presented, as Ayame will cope over her loss of her former boyfriend, Tanukichi Okuma. Oh, by the way, this sequel will also feature some of the remaining characters of this anime/manga series.  
Folks, the show's not over, just yet. Another "Shimoneta" Bizarre Tale is coming this way. Don't miss it._

* * *

 ** _Disclaimer:_** _The preceding fic was NOT intended for children. This was a "Shimoneta" fanfic, which was heavily uncensored (from Ayame Kajou only), and contained sexual scenes and explicit language.  
I apologize for the lewd adult behavior that I have written in. Thank you._

* * *

 ** _Good night out there, wherever you are…_**


End file.
